The Secret Life of a Female Gamer

Oh, the first blog post–honestly, I’ve never been good at starting anything. Introduction? Forget it, you can just give me an “F” on that assignment, 11th grade English Teacher (I’m not 16 anymore, FYI).

When I would bring up the idea for this blog, I a) didn’t think it would actually go anywhere, as in…with a url, and b) people would ask me what it was about. Que? It’s about WoW, what else do you need to know? Well that was enough to get the ball rolling on the jokes made at my expense, until of course I’d make some off hand remark about playing in my underwear. Then the conversation turns to what kind of underwear I wear, and I’m off the hook for a while.

Well my dears, this blog is more specifically aimed at the women gamer aspect of it all, but it’s ultimately for everyone’s enjoyment. You don’t need to even play WoW to appreciate the fact that some girls just like to rape face on a PvP server somewhere. In fact, if some guy wanted to get to know a girl gamer better, then chances are looking at this site will help him grasp the true meaning of what she believes love is–creating and filling the lives of lower-level ally/horde players with absolute holy terror.

Besides, any man who doesn’t think that a girl who can grind out mobs by herself is sexy shouldn’t be allowed to breed. That being said, yes, I’ve had quite a few number of guys who have openly shown disgust in my playing this game. Apparently it’s downright sex if you can name some Star Wars trivia, but the moment you say anything about an MMO, you’ve lost that lovin’ feeling and you’re back to the coin operated version of where a boyfriend should be.

But let’s get one thing straight–questing solo is NOT like being a crazy cat lady, in terms of the girl just thinking, “you know what? I just want to focus on my herbalism and eat some cat food“. It’s more empowering than anything because it’s a sense of accomplishment. What do you accomplish when a level 80 Death Knight runs you and three others through Blackrock Spire five times? I’ll tell you what I learned – the in’s and out’s of getting back and forth from the graveyard, because all I ever did was aggro a bunch of shit. It takes the fun out of playing because you don’t learn anything.

The entire reason why I started playing World of Warcrack is because my ex did. One day I said, “Don’t tell anyone this, but I’ve never played WoW before”. This caused him to crack a smile and respond, “Oh, you are both adorable and confused.” Because all my friend’s were gamers, I assumed that WoW was in the same realm as Xbox and Playstation–clearly, I was mistaken. So in an effort to be an awesome boyfriend, the ex convinced a friend to give me his account with Burning Crusades already on it (a savings of about $50), and I rolled a Draenai Shaman on his server, Echo Isles.

Being in a relationship and playing WoW together is fine, unless the guy/girl has been playing it for over a year and has many alts, as well as a level 80 main. They become pompous and run you through quests without you even being able to read them because they’re going too quickly. This sparked, and I’m not joking, fights between us. Over a GAME (but let me tell you he could be a real jackass when it came to escort quests. Just ghost wolf and run, he said. You’ll be fine, he said. Moral of the story: if you’re doing a long escort quest, don’t get out of a 30 yard range or you fail it, and chances are you’ll hear, I’m not doing it again).

Onto the point–look, the moment he and I broke up I started doing things on my own. And with the exception of instances and that really fucking crappy ass motherfucking assblow cockshit quest called Scarlet Diversions in Western Plaguelands, I’ve been pretty much on my own. You have to read your own log, pay attention to your surroundings, pull and wipe out the mobs preventing you from finishing your quest. Because questing with a douchebag is like being on a bad date; it starts off well, until you realize this guy thinks way too highly of his sub-par skills, and create a character on the opposite faction just so you can gank and camp him for several hours as a big “fuck you” for not believing you had any skill to do it yourself.

chaime Uncategorized coin operated quest, douchebags, fail, horde, soloing